I'm vaguely familiar with safe spaces. I recently played tag with a friend's 5 year old, and I was reminded that when playing tag, you NEED to set up a base where tag doesn't count. 5 year olds are really arbitrary about where and when bases exist, but let me tell you this - she put them everywhere, and playing with her was annoying. Losing at tag to a kid who makes the rules was humiliating. A place where you are "safe" has no place in tag or in life.
Which brings me to the most offensive secret safe-spaces in American culture, and I'm honestly shocked this has not been discussed more.
The NFL is absolutely chock full of safe spaces, and it is downright un-American.
The other team's end zone is an absurd place to have a safe-space, but there it is. Defenders are allowed to clobber whoever is holding the ball until that slippery eel touches the safe zone and is totally off limits.
|Take a look at this pansy taking advantage of a safe space.|
|No wonder Rex Ryan tries to stay on the sidelines|
Compare that to a real sport like professional wrestling, where once you knock your opponent out of the ring, you do whatever it takes to finish him because that's how life works. Don't like it? Tough. Eat a steel ladder.
|Real men have no use for boundaries|
Football isn't immune to the politically correct trend, either. Some players are somehow "different" and hitting them is a foul. Touch a kicker the wrong way and a defender gets flagged, even when the kicker is in the middle of the playing field.
|Quit acting like the rules should be different for the vulnerable among us|
These rules insisting that kickers, exposed receivers, or throwing quarterbacks somehow deserve different treatment destroys the integrity of the game. The nerve of Cam Newton appealing to referees because defenders aren't respecting his safe space on the field!
|Don't think of it as brain damage, think of it as a quaterback's rite of passage|
I firmly believe that everyone should have a place where they make the rules and feel like they are in control. For me, like many American males, that is my home. I should not feel like anyone else is imposing their arbitrary and oppressive power structures when I just want to relax and not deal with other people making me feel crappy. My safe space is the football season, so please get your safe spaces out of it.
ed. note - the opinions above do not represent the actual opinions of the author. He is simply grumpy about recent events and decided sarcasm was an ok coping mechanism.